A Quick Hotlist

I’ve got a lot of albums that I want to give attention to, but just don’t have the time/patience/textual dexterity to write about each individually. So, I’m compiling a quick list of albums that are worthy of attention. they might not all be new, but screw it; I’m not up on what’s new anyway. So, submitted for your approval, a list:

• Kanye West – Graduation. I can’t say I’m a fan of most contemporary hip-hop, but I picked this up on a whim, and I have to say I’m real impressed, and not just because he (successfully) sampled Steely Dan on the track “Champion.”

• Sigur Rós – ( ) [the Blank Album]. This album intrigued me immediately with it’s minimalistic ethos. It’s very ambient, and a beautifully constructed breakup album. Listen to this one while it’s raining and think about how she’s never coming back.

• Between the Buried and Me – Colors. I had written off this band when I’d first heard them, mostly due to the screamy vocals. However, this album is not only the best metal album I’ve heard in a couple years, it’s probably one of the most dynamic albums released in the last few years, period.

• Muse – Black Holes and Revelations. I simply can’t get enough of this album. Muse writes some of the most exciting songs I’ve heard in a long time; the bombastic “Knights of Cydonia” immediately comes to mind. Honorable mention to their equally awesome previous effort, Absolution.
  

• Kasabian – Kasabian. Super tasty Stone Roses-esque revivalists. the songs are real catchy with a nouveau-retro Britrock bite.

• Jeff Buckley – Grace. Yeah, I know I’ve talked about this album already; it’s that good. The man wrote some of the best chord progressions I’ve ever heard and could sing the pants off of a nun.

• The Sword – Age of Winters. These Texans do sludgy, old-school garage metal and they do it damn well.

• Queens of the Stone Age – Era Vulgaris. You don’t need a reason to pick up the latest QotSA album. You just need to know it’s out.

• Kamelot – Ghost Opera. Operatic swords-and-mountains power metal, American style.

• Minus the Bear – Menos el Oso. Tasty, tasty Seattle indie-prog-pop that will put you in a good mood. For the perfect nighttime driving soundtrack, check out their EP, This is What I Know About Being Gigantic.

Hey, have I steered you wrong before?

Doubt it.

Guitar Hero Etiquette

It’s been fairly well established that Guitar Hero is around to stay.The game is a near-universally enjoyable way to kill an afternoon or evening with your friends. Oftentimes entire parties are centered around the game, bringing a whole new social slant to playing the game. Whether you’re playing with a partner, against an opponent, or flying solo in front of adoring spectators, I think it’s time some basic rules of etiquette and common courtesy were laid out to make Guitar Hero fun and enjoyable for all involved.

• Establish Order of Turns. This is obvious, and should be gotten out of the way immediately. Especially if only one controller is available. Have co-op partners pair off early, and have Pro Face-Off challengers sign up, a la beer pong. (This really only applies to larger gatherings; groups of 5 or less need not adhere.)

• Limit Re-Tries. No one wants to watch someone fail a song 4 times in a row. Try this as a rule of thumb: If a player fails a song before reaching 50% Completion, allow one re-try. If they fail at 51% or later, that’s their turn.

• No Repeat Songs.This isn’t Top 40 radio; no one wants to hear the same songs over and over. If a song you wanted to play has already been done, allow a buffer of at least 5 songs before selecting it. If a song you wanted to play has already been done twice, forget it. There are 50 songs to choose from; don’t just play “Jessica” nine times.

• Don’t Backseat Play.If you know the tricky strumming pattern, or the fact that it’s easier to anchor the index finger on the red for this passage, keep it to yourself. If the player hasn’t asked for your help, they don’t want it. And for God’s sake, don’t drum out the strumming pattern on your lap.

• Don’t Hog one Guitar. Unless the room is trying one-by-one to unseat a current champion, no one single person should bogart one controller for 3 songs in a row. This includes the host, or whoever owns the game or controllers.

• Avoid “Freebird.” Unless there’s only a couple hardcore players left around, or you’ve been playing tourney-style and Freebird is the ominous, looming final round, steer clear of this 10-minute test of the rest of the room’s patience.

• Showmanship, People!Don’t just stand there like you’re in the Dandy Warhols; Rock out! There’s a reason they made that wonderful little plastic Gibson, folks. Jump around! Bang your head! Get funky.

Of course, once Rock Band comes out, all bets are off.

Gonna Hang Me in the Mornin’…

3:10 to Yuma is arguably the best Western I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen Young Guns. So I know what I’m talking about.

The film was emotional, exciting, well-filmed, exceptionally well-acted, and had a very powerful ending. I’m not even going to waste time writing about it.

I will only say this: Go out and see 3:10 to Yuma.

On Halloween.

I don’t like horror movies.

I find them archaic, archetypal, predictable, and insufferably boring. The best “scare” most horror movies can hope to elicit are cheap “gotchas” that just make me jump and frustrate me because that’s the best they can do. What I’m looking for most in a film is a compelling character, something in which the horror genre is decisively lacking.

That said, I admit  I’ve always had a soft spot for Halloween.  Perhaps it’s sentimental; I saw it way back as a little kid and all the “bogeyman” talk resonated with me. And I always like Michael Myers more than other horror icons, because he didn’t talk, and therefore didn’t spew out awful puns, and he wasn’t a gruesome, lumbering abomination that relied on increasingly graphic (and ludicrous ) death scenes to make his films worth watching. He was very simple, and arresting in that simplicity: he was the Bogeyman. He was Death, plain and simple.

But still, as a film Halloween isn’t particularly wonderful; the dialogue seems hokey, and the acting is eye-rollingly lame (in my opinion the best performance was delivered by Nick Castle, the man under the mask).

When I found out Rob Zombie was remaking Halloween, I was exhilarated. I’ve consistently enjoyed Zombie’s films and I thought if anyone could actually make this movie better, it’d be Zombie.

I wasn’t wrong.

The original film is about a babysitter being terrorized by an anonymous and unstoppable assailant. Zombie’s Halloween is about a tormented child driven to unspeakable acts by “a perfect storm” of circumstance. On synopsis alone, I like Zombie’s movie better already.

The acting is exponentially better: Daeg Faerch is alarmingly effective as the young Michael Myers, Sheri Moon-Zombie give her best performance to date, and flat as he is, Malcolm McDowell is still twice as good as Donald Pleasance.

Most importantly, this film’s given what I want most: a compelling character in Michael Myers. He’s transformed from a mysterious harbinger of doom (which is mildly interesting, I’ll admit) into something almost akin to a Greek tragedy. He is a monster bred, not born. Zombie has transformed something which seemed far-away, a grim fairy tale of a silent madman, into something very, very real. And that is disturbing. And disturbing is the best kind of scary.

…But You Don’t Really Care for Music, Do You?

Last night I found myself lying in bed staring at the ceiling, mouth agape in stupification at what I was hearing. Surely nothing could sound this good. Could it really be so powerful, so emotional, so moving as to essentially hypnotize me? And more importantly: Why haven’t I been listening to this all my life?

I’m talking about an album.
An album called Grace.
An album called Grace by Jeff Buckley.

Jeff Buckley wrote each one of the songs on Grace as if on the next day, he was going to die.  Each one is so urgent, so sincere that I literally laid in bed with chills running up and down my spine, deciding then and there that this was among the best music I’d ever heard. It makes it all the more depressing to know that Buckley drowned in 1997.

Get this album. Listen to it. Have your heart broken.

Examination of Conscience

Again,
I’m sorry.
I didn’t mean
to slam your head
into the wall
as I fucked you
from behind.